I found this article to support a conversation I had with a trusted colleague recently. The article used different examples than I did, but the takeaways for me in reading it are the new terms that I may use and the exclusionary behavior that pervades the actions of some.
It isn't just about the people one can count on your teams (representation) or about judging people by cultural norms that don't represent them, it is about recognizing the richness of what each culture brings, and measuring people by their results. #DiversityIsProfitable
Here are a couple excerpts:
"We all know that it’s unacceptable to call a team member a racial slur, but some people may not always be aware of more subtle acts of bias or understand why they’re harmful."
Some actually use rumor and innuendo to harm those they gaslight everyday privately. Some who have escaped narcisstic relationships know of this dynamic, where the person knows exactly how to hurt you in a way that only they and you recognize, then they gaslight you saying you are taking something personally that is actually meant to be a personal slight that is unrecognizable to others. The amount of psychic and actual energy it takes to address these slights is exhausting and creates a hostile work environment for the targets of this behavior.
Many of us find new jobs, rather than confront this behavior in companies/societies that don't get it or don't care. I hope for a world where that is no longer necessary.
Black people grew up with the idiom found in the first line of this excerpt, and it is part of the values we expect from each other -
“When we learn better, we do better,” says Jana. “The term ‘microaggression’ is an insult to everyone who’s ever been on the receiving end of it, and it’s a copout for the people who continue to initiate them.” Whatever term we land on — microaggression, subtle act of exclusion, racial abuse, or exclusionary behavior — Jana reminds us that “it needs to be something that doesn’t let people off the hook so easily and doesn’t minimize the harm that it causes to actual people.”
People need to wonder about those who have been told better but refuse to do better. The proof is usually clear for those who understand these toxic dynamics.
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